It’s true. Golf is dangerous.

And it doesn’t get the respect it deserves.

Let me explain for Sorta Random Sunday.

I bought some golf clubs

Growing up, I played a little golf. I was never great. And I enjoyed other sports like baseball or football much more. So I never put a lot of focus into getting good.

During college and medical school and residency, I played very rarely. But, now that I graduated and have a bit more free time, I’ve played a couple times with my dad and step dad, both of whom are very good.

And I enjoyed it.

So, I made an intentional decision. I researched and found a full set of golf clubs including the bag for $249. They’re nothing fancy. But the bottle neck between me and a successful golf outing is definitely not the clubs.

I bought them using a cash gift I received from refinancing my student loans through Credible.

Then I used the clubs

I went to a public driving range a couple times and was feeling myself. Needless to say, I was hitting the ball pretty well. I got pumped up.

So, the following week, I had a day where I clinically was finished around 2 PM. I knew this ahead of time so I packed my clubs in the car that morning.

On the way home, I Googled the closest public golf course. Next thing I knew, I was there. I bought a pass for 9 holes and a cart. And I got going.

It was a disaster

Correction…an unmitigated disaster.

Little did I know that this public course was considered one of the toughest in the area. The fairways are very narrow and surrounded by tall, thick grass and brush.

Accuracy is not yet my strength in the golf game. I bought a pack of 12 balls. By the 4th hole, I was in danger of losing them all.

After I hit my 8th or 9th ball into this brush, I started to get nervous that I wouldn’t have enough balls to last.

So, into the brush went I

I figured that even if I couldn’t find my actual ball, I’d find some other lost balls to make up for my shortfall. So, I spent 10 or so minutes in there swinging around with my 9 iron like a jungle explorer’s machete. I found a few balls and exited.

Even with my new found balls, I lost them all before the 7th hole and left, tail between legs.

But it gets worse!

This is were golf gets dangerous.

That weekend, before I went to bed on Saturday, I noticed that the area under my left eye was red and itchy. I ignored it like every good doctor does.

Sunday, it was a hot, burning, itchy mess. My eye was nearly swollen shut.

I had gotten poison ivy or poison oak! No doubt from my ball search!

And it still gets worse. Over the next week, it spread to all over my body…and I mean alllllll over. (Don’t worry, I’ll spare you the pictures)

As I write this, I am squirming in my seat trying not to itch my hydrocortisone lathered body.

So the moral of the story, my friends, is be careful when you play the dangerous, no-good game of golf!

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